Not Happy = Sad?

Here we officially welcome winter 2013. The lowest temperature that I have experienced throughout the week was 8 degree celsius. That gloomy weather is not interesting, never ever.

Sifting through my memory for a vague collection of the happiness, excitement and of course, anxiety, there is no way to get back to the past.  There is the before. and then there is the after! There will be the people that I have never met; there will be the things that I have never tried and know. There will be the things I will carry with me as I go.. So what is the point of getting annoyed and disappointed? 

It is damn easy to tell someone else 'Happiness is what you choose' but when it comes to myself, I stay silence. We can eventually settle into a quiet pattern together.. Not that I'm not happy now, hey at least I am not sad. Not happy = sad? I doubt that.

HAHA

I get annoyed when people try to get me to conform to preset patterns. I don't call myself as a stubborn kid, you can persuade me, encourage me but please, please please don't force me. Or just accept me for who I am? Like how I accept and affirm you.

Whatever lah, decision has been made. what done is done and I believe it is right at the time I did it: I have no time to change my mind later just because I begin to think or feel I might have made a mistake.
"I like you for you always being so sensitive, you are sensitive on others' feelings. I wonder how you get to know their feelings."
hahaha, I'm not Edward the vampire I can't read mind; perhaps it isn't that good to be way too sensitive.

You know, things always get worst when it reaches the best.
nah what crap am I talking about.

God is Good. He tells me what to do.

Thank you Lord for giving me the courage to make the decision. 

and now at least I can smile, ignoring the disappointment that flares like a rocket grenade.

bahaha.